End of Eternity 3 Page 7

  “Carm? What did…” Owen trails off mid-sentence as he takes in my injured state. He pauses and swallows loudly, and I can almost feel the ground trembling with his growing anger. “Did that—that bastard do this?” he says in a sinister whisper. “God, Carm. Did you let him do this to you? You let him do this for your stupid plan?”

  He sounds so angry. I’ve never seen Owen this angry before, and it’s refreshing. “I tried to record everything with my phone,” I whisper to him, “but my battery died and it wiped the recording.”

  “You stupid girl!” Owen whispers. He briskly walks over to me with a stormy look on his face. “You stupid, brainless girl!” he roars. “I never should have let you go through with this sick and disgusting plan in the first place.” He looks at me with fear and fury swirling in his eyes. “Why would you let him hurt you like this? I told you that I wouldn’t agree to help if your plan involved you getting hurt. There are people who care about you in this world, and you can’t put yourself at risk like this. You can’t sacrifice yourself to take some lowlife down! It’s not worth it.”

  I reach up to grasp one of his hands and squeeze it gently. I know that he’s not actually angry at me, and that he’s just upset that this happened. “I wasn’t getting anywhere, Owen,” I say softly. “I thought the drugs would make him harmless, but they didn’t.”

  Owen places two fingers lightly on my cheek, and I wince. “He hit you?” Owen asks in a shaking voice. I can almost hear his blood boiling under his skin.

  “No. Not exactly.”

  “That fucking monster,” he says with a snakelike hiss. “I’m going to rip his spine out, break it in half, and drink his fucking bone marrow.”

  Helen and I look at each other in surprise. My throat feels a little dry and I get a shiver of dread; the idea of Owen hurting anyone is so preposterous.

  “I’m going to call the doctor,” Helen says, reaching out to touch my arm. “Dr. Howard is really nice and trustworthy, and I think she can take care of this without making it worse for you, Carm.”

  “I’m going to take her upstairs and get her cleaned up,” Owen says, reaching out to pull me into his arms. He slides an arm under my knees, and another around my back. Even though he’s angry, the way he touches me is so gentle that it causes me no pain at all. He lifts me easily against his chest, and moves toward the door.

  “Not too cleaned up!” Helen calls after him. “We still need—”

  “I know!” Owen snaps at her. “I’m a fucking doctor, too, remember?”

  My sister flinches at this slightly, and glares at Owen as he exits the room. As he moves into the foyer to carry me up the long flight of stairs, I smile against his chest.

  “You’re sexy when you’re angry,” I tell him teasingly.

  “Jesus, Carmen,” he says in exasperation. “That’s so inappropriate. You’re really not in a position to be finding anyone sexy right now.”

  “But you’re being all heroic,” I point out.

  “I’m just being a decent human being, unlike all the other men in your life.”

  “Yeah,” I say with a smile. “You’re really hot when you’re a decent human being.”

  “Carmen, now you’re doing it. You’re pretending to be extra-cheerful to distract from the gravity of the situation. Can you stop it? You can be real with me.”

  I lower my head slightly, and let myself sigh. “Owen,” I murmur. My lip trembles slightly. “The drugs didn’t work. My recording didn’t work. Monitoring him doesn’t work. What am I going to do?”

  “You’re going to do absolutely nothing,” Owen tells me. “Because this whole plan of yours was fucked up from the start. I’m going to take care of you, and I’m not going to let you near that monster again.”

  “But I need to hurt him, Owen. How can I go on if I don’t? He took my baby from me.”

  Owen lifts me a little higher so he can place a kiss on my forehead. “You’re not a criminal mastermind, Carmen. I know you’ve been trying pretty hard, but this guy’s better. He’s been at it for years, hurting people his whole damn life. It comes as easily to him as breathing.”

  “So what do I do?”

  “You survive,” he says simply.

  Chapter Ten

  “That wasn’t so terrible, was it?” Dr. Leslie Howard asks as she sits at my bedside and closes the little box. She has her blonde hair styled up into a matronly French twist with plenty of hairspray, and she is wearing makeup meant to conceal the wrinkles beside her lips and eyes.

  “I think that was as fast and painless as something like this could possibly be,” I tell her thankfully. “Please don’t tell my dad, Leslie. I don’t want him to worry.”

  “Okay,” she says with a concerned nod. “And you’re sure that you don’t want any emergency contraception?”

  I smile sadly. “The doctors at the hospital said I would never be able to have children.”

  “Sometimes, our bodies can surprise us,” Dr. Howard says softly. “Owen also mentioned to me that you were still producing milk for donation? That should also provide you some protection against pregnancy.”

  “I think pregnancy is the least of my worries,” I say glumly.

  “You’re a very brave girl, Carmen,” Leslie tells me gently. She looks toward the window, and sighs deeply. “I really hoped I’d never have to make another house call like this to the Winters’ household. Seeing your sister like that, years ago—that was rough. I was almost happy that your mom wasn’t around to see that happen to her little girl…”

  “Helen was an innocent victim,” I explain to Leslie, “but I’m not. I knew who this man was, and by being around him, I knew I was putting myself at risk.”

  “Oh, no, sweet girl. You can’t blame yourself for something like this. You didn’t ask for this or make him do this—it was not your fault, not even a little.”

  “You don’t even know the half of it, Leslie. Remember the guy who hurt Helen all those years ago? I married him.”

  The doctor stares at me. “What?”

  “Yeah. She tried to warn me and I didn’t listen.” Seeing the horrified look on Leslie’s face, I feel the need to explain more. Our family doctor was close friends with my mother, and I’ve always considered her an aunt or family member. “You see, the guy who did this to me is even worse. He was my husband’s best friend. He is the reason my husband was so messed up. I was just trying to get close to him so that I could expose him for who he really is. I let him do this to me because I thought that my phone would be recording everything, and that I would have proof that I told him to stop. Over and over again.” I shake my head with a sarcastic smile.

  “Carmen, are you crazy?” Leslie asks me with puzzlement. “You didn’t let him rape you. There’s no such thing. If you said no, that was all you were required to do. If he continued, it’s his fault, not yours.”

  “I could have fought harder,” I tell her in frustration. “I could have stopped him! This was all pointless. It’s all such a waste. What use is a rape kit if it doesn’t have the evidence that I really need? Proof of lack of consent.”

  “Honey, you have bruises on you that are consistent with signs of a struggle. You delivered a baby recently, and that took a toll on your body and mind; no one is going to believe you wanted this. If you want to press charges against him, you certainly could. I would testify for you.”

  “It’s not enough,” I say weakly, leaning back against the pillow. “It’s just not enough.”

  “If you need some psychological counseling, I know a good doctor,” Leslie says gently. When I glare at her for this, she winces. “Okay, okay, Superwoman. Let’s pretend that you’re such a badass that you don’t need therapy. But I do highly recommend that… oh, Carmen.” She sighs deeply. “If only Meredith was here. You poor girl.”

  “I’m actually filthy rich,” I inform her, frustrated by her pitying look. “Thanks for helping, but I would like to be alone for a little while. Actually, you can let Owen come back in.
”

  “Sure thing, sweetie.” Leslie moves toward the door and pauses. “Carmen, can I just ask you—”

  “If this is about my dad, then yes. Please ask him out already. Good god, what are you old people waiting for? He really needs a woman in his life. Please go on a date with him.”

  Leslie’s face displays surprise. “I wasn’t going to ask about that, but… okay. Maybe I will. Richard and I did go on a few dates, long ago, before he even met your mother, but we never really connected. We just had really different opinions about everything. We were totally incompatible.”

  “Well, now that you’re not teenagers anymore, maybe you’ve both changed,” I tell her. “So why don’t you try getting to know him again? My dad is a lonely workaholic, but he’s a really sweet guy.”

  “I know,” Leslie says as she moves to exit the room. “Alright, Carmen. I’ll give it a shot, just for you. But only if you promise me to get some rest and completely avoid the monster who did this to you.”

  I consider this for a few seconds before nodding. “I suppose you’re right. I should stop spending time with him.” At least for a few days, until I can figure out a better plan of attack, I think to myself.

  “Great,” she says, opening the door to exit my bedroom. She has barely stepped out before Owen moves back in.

  “Is everything okay?” he asks quickly. “Carm?”

  “She’s going to be fine,” Leslie says, patting Owen’s shoulder gently. “Now calm down, young man, before you blow a brain vessel.”

  I giggle at the look on Owen’s face as the older doctor scolds him. When she moves past him and into the hallway, Owen quickly closes the door and moves to my side. He doesn’t even ask before lifting the covers and climbing into bed with me. He wraps his arms around me and holds me close.

  “I’m so mad at you,” Owen says softly.

  “I know.”

  “But I’m way angrier at myself. I never should have let you near that guy. I knew this was a bad idea from the start.”

  “It was only a bad idea because I screwed up,” I say sadly. “If I had succeeded, it would have been a great idea. I just kept hitting roadblocks, and when I finally was able to catch him doing something criminal… I messed up.”

  “You did your best,” Owen says gently. “I know it took some serious balls to try to give that guy what he deserves. But you need to stop now, Carmen. You need to focus on yourself.”

  “I can’t. This really matters to me. I feel like I’m the only one who knows that there’s a vicious beast living in this city, and I am the only one who can bring him down.”

  “You can’t go through life focused on bringing someone else down. You need to focus on bringing yourself up.” Owen squeezes me tightly. “There are a lot of cruel people in New York City. We can’t live in fear of them every day, or spend all our energy trying to get rid of them. We need to focus on the good things in life. The things that make life worthwhile.”

  I am quiet for a few seconds as I consider his advice. “I don’t think I have any of those good things, Owen. I’ve lost so much lately. All I can think about is the fact that if I don’t stop Brad, he’s going to hurt someone else. He’s going to hurt someone who actually has something to lose.”

  “He did just hurt someone, Carmen. He hurt you. You need to drop him like a hot potato, and promise me never to go within, like, two astronomical units of that guy.”

  “Astronomical units?” I repeat with a smile.

  “It’s the distance from the earth to the…”

  “I know. Look, Owen. Brad just raped me. But I’m perfectly fine. I swear! I’m not even that upset. I’m more upset about the recording than anything else. I’m upset that I let it upset me a tiny bit immediately after it happened, and that got in the way of preserving my recording. But I’m totally fine. I’m not the kind of girl that lets something like this get her down. I’m stronger than that. So much terrible shit has happened—I’ve been through way worse and I can handle—”

  Owen shuts me up by placing a kiss on my lips.

  I am surprised into motionlessness for a moment, but then I find myself kissing back. My lips begin to move of their own accord, and they become more and more desperate and demanding. God, it feels so good to kiss someone I actually want to kiss. I haven’t even seen Owen in weeks, and I’ve missed him so much that this kiss makes me want to cry. I reach up and put both of my arms around his neck and hold him tightly against me. He runs his hand over my back gently, and the comforting feeling sends tingles through my stomach. And then…

  “Ow, ow,” I say, pulling away and wincing. “Dammit, Owen.”

  “What’s wrong?” he asks anxiously, leaping away from me. “Do you want me to get Dr. Howard back here?”

  “No,” I tell him, laughing softly. “She’d probably yell at you.”

  “What did I do?” he asks with wide and fearful eyes.

  A blush creeps into my cheeks. “I was starting to get turned on, and it was burning a little down there. I’m still really sore.”

  “Hey, I was just giving you a quick peck to shut you up. You’re the one who escalated things!” he accuses. Then he breaks out into a grin. “So do I really turn you on?”

  I roll my eyes at him in annoyance.

  “Okay, but really,” Owen says. “The reason I kissed you is because you were talking crazy. You were talking like you deserve this happening to you. Like it’s better that it happened to you instead of someone else, just because you’re tougher than the average girl.”

  “You think I’m tougher than the average girl?” I ask him with a smile.

  “Heck, yes!” he says, sitting back down on the bed. “Only the toughest of chicks could go through what you have and still find a way to smile every day.”

  “Thanks, Owen,” I say, placing my hand on his leg to convey my genuine gratitude. “But the truth is that I do think it’s better if this shit happens to me instead of some other girl. I keep thinking about what Helen went through. She was so sweet and innocent back then—I don’t know if she’d even ever had sex. She had one boyfriend in high school, but he was the really nerdy and timid sort, so I don’t think he would have had been able to pressure her into anything.”

  “Don’t underestimate nerdy guys,” Owen says with a wink. “They spend all their spare time watching internet porn, while the jocks wrestle with each other in the locker rooms.”

  “Are you speaking from experience?” I ask him. “Anyway, we’d just always kept Helen so shielded and guarded from all the crap in the world. Then all this crap was dumped on her head all at once. We lost mom, and Grayson raped her. For her to experience something like that? It really wrecked her. Look at her, now! She can’t even remember the last three years of her life. Was it really the accident that caused it, or could she just no longer stand to remember? If you know something too awful to bear, can the brain really wipe itself clean so that you can go on living without the constant reminders? Helen couldn’t even be around people after what happened to her. She was so afraid, and so irrevocably damaged.”

  “What happened to her was awful, for sure,” Owen says, “but you deserve to be safe, too, Carmen.”

  I shrug nonchalantly. “Owen, I’ve never been safe. Do you know what it’s like for a girl like me to go on dates in this city? I don’t know if I just attract the worst sort of person, or if it’s like that for everyone, but I’ve had so many jerk-ass boyfriends. Maybe I just tried to see the best in everyone, or stupidly tried to change their bad-boy ways. You would be surprised at some of the stories I could tell you. This is just another crappy day for me, and I’ll get over it easily. I’m not fragile. I bend easily, but I don’t break. But somewhere out there, there’s an untouched, unharmed little girl who won’t have the same luck. If Brad gets his hands on her, it’ll fuck her whole life up. She might drop out of school like my sister did—even worse, she might end up dead like Grayson’s first girlfriend. Or like my daughter.”

  Owen st
ares at me, and for the first time in our acquaintance, it looks like he doesn’t know what to say.

  “I want to save her,” I tell him with a tearful smile. “I don’t want her to have the same miserable life that I did. I know there are other bad guys out there, and I can’t save her from all of them—but I can get rid of this one guy, at the very least. I should be able to take care of Brad, right? If I can’t do that, what can I do?”

  “You can be happy,” Owen says gently, “with me.”

  I shake my head and laugh lightly. “With you? Come on. And what does Caroline think about that?”

  “I just broke up with her.”

  “What?” I stare at him skeptically. “No way. I don’t believe you.”

  Owen scratches his head thoughtfully. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe I forgot. One sec.” Pulling out his phone, Owen speed-dials his girlfriend and puts her on speaker. She picks up after only one ring.

  “Hello, Owen?”

  “Hey, Caroline. So, this isn’t easy, but I think we both knew it was coming. I’m breaking up with you. Yep, it’s finally over. What a relief! Hope we can still be pals. Laterz.”

  And with that, Owen hangs up the phone.

  I am pretty sure I have a dumbfounded look on my face. “What the hell, Owen?”

  “Like I was saying, I just broke up with her,” Owen says with a grin. “I’m totally single. So, do you wanna go steady?”

  “Owen!” I say in disbelief. “Are you insane?”

  “No,” he says proudly. “I’m efficient!”

  “You can’t just—” His phone starts ringing, I gesture to it frantically. “Pick it up! Tell her it was a joke. Jesus!”

  “I’m not answering it,” Owen says, crossing his arms over his chest. “That would be rude! Talking to my ex when I’m trying to pick up a new chick?”